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This is a transcribed copy of "You Are Rad".
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Previous: "You Get Me" Next: "Just Be a Pebble"
Speaker Dialogue
The episode starts off K.O. walking happily to work]
Mr. Logic Hello there, K.O.
K.O. Hello.
Potato [Pops out of the bushes] Hi, K.O.
K.O. Hey!
Pterodactyl K.O.! K.O.!
K.O. Hello.
Cool Sun Heya, K.O.
K.O. [Thinking] Another perfect day ahead of me at my perfect job wearing my perfect little vest and my perfectly pinned name ta—
[Enid and Rad snores. K.O. screams waking them up]
Enid What?! What happened?!
[Titlecard appears]
K.O. It’s an emergency! [Gasps] I forgot my name tag.
[Enid and Rad laughs]
K.O. It’s not funny! Without a name tag, do I even exist? How do you define exist?
Rad Well, I got a half-day suckers. [Throws mop and tosses his name tag to K.O.] You can borrow this while I’m gone.
K.O. [Holds Rad’s name tag and gasps] Rad’s name tag.
Rad See you later, jerks.
K.O. [Hops on the counter] Enid! This is so cool! Check it out. It’s a-me, Rad! Do you even [farts] lift? [Laughs]
Enid Hey, pretty good. Oh! [Snaps fingers and puts straws on K.O.’s hair] Ha! What do you think? [Holds mirror out]
K.O. [Gasps] I look exactly like Rad.
Enid No way. Rad could never be that cute.
K.O. [Gasps] A customer. Hi. Can I help you?
[Ted Viking groans]
Foxy No, thanks, Rad. We’re just in for a top off. [Notices the coffee spilling] Whoa! All right, big guy, let’s go.
K.O. [Gasps intensely] Enid, did you hear what they called me? I’m Rad now.
Enid Chill out, brush head. Those two are dumb-dumbs. There’s no way anyone else is gonna mistake you for R—.
Bell Beefer Rad! We’ve been looking all over for you. [Bell Beefer and Mega Football Baby comes in the store]
Enid Okay, bye. [Turns into a tree stump]
Bell Beefer You were supposed to meet us at the arcade.
K.O. Arcade?
Mega Football Baby Don’t tell me you forgot, Rad.
K.O. [Thinking] All right, K.O., you’re finally getting an opportunity to walk a day in Rad’s patent leather boots. Of course I want to go to the arcade! Let’s get out of here, uh, dudes.
[Show scene with K.O., Bell Beefer, and Mega Football Baby in the arcade]
Mega Football Baby Hey, Rad, want to play me in Throw a Shot?
[Pird tries to throw the bowling ball but falls onto him]
K.O. Uh…
Bell Beefer Or maybe we can have that air hockey rematch.
[The loser gets slimed in the Air Hockey game]
K.O. Ew. Or we could play Mowing Boy 2!
Machine Hoo-rah. Hoo-rah.
[Bell Beefer and Mega Football Baby laughs]
Mega Football Baby For real though, Pop a Shot or air hockey?
K.O. [Thinking] K.O. can’t play either of those games, but I’m not K.O. anymore. I’m Rad! And Rad is never limited by his decisions. I will play both.
Announcer 3… 2… 1… Ready? Go!
[Bell Beefer hits the air hockey puck and K.O. protects his goal. The puck moves at a slow rate. K.O. slids for a round of Throw a Shot]
Mega Football Baby About time. You’re already… [Makes a shot] losing!
[K.O. throws three bowling balls making in the net. Mega Football Baby gasps]
[Air Hockey puck still moves slow and then Mega Football Baby and K.O. compete. K.O. makes the lost shot and wins. Mega Football Baby cries. K.O. is back at the air hockey game with Bell Beefer sleep drooling]
Air Hockey Puck Dude Oh. Ew! [Makes it in Bell Beefer’s goal]
[Bell Beefer gets slimed]
Announcer Rad wins!
K.O. [Jumps] Yeah! [Laughs]
Drupe Wow, Rad, you’re great at these games. Let’s hang out later, yeah?
K.O. Okay.
Mega Football Baby Whoa! Way to go, Rad. It looks like she actually digs you.
K.O. Wow. A new friend.
Mega Football Baby More than friends, dude.
K.O. [Gasps] Best friends. [Thinking] This is so fun. Exactly what I imagined it was like being Rad.
Calendar Shop Tiger Yo, Rad, just got a new shipment of these kitten-a-day calendars you love.
K.O. Yeah! Those calendars rule! [Thinking] Wait a sec. Didn’t Rad say…
Rad [As a cloud bubble] The only animals I care about are sharks and bees.
K.O. Yeah, that’s what I thought.
Ginger [Carries groceries] Rad, hope to see you at yoga again this week.
Rad Sure, yoga strengthens your core, but core is nothing when you’ve got guns.
K.O. Wait, I’m confused.
Gertie Oh, Rad! [Her kids hug K.O.] I just wanted to thank you again for babysitting my kids. They can’t stop talking about you teaching them proper weight-lifting form. [Hugs K.O.] You’re such an angel! All right, kids, let’s get a move on!
K.O. [Writes a list of “Radjectives” while thinking] Rad isn’t just some muscular jock. My mind was in a prison, but I know the truth now. Rad is… deep.
[Rad orders takeout at Weiner Kabob]
Rad Let me see, uh, [Picks his nose] let me get five double kabobs and a large thirst blaster.
Bud That’ll be $15.80.
Rad Here you go, dude. [Hands Bud his card]
Bud [Slides card and blasts receipt to Rad] Please sign. [Hands him a pen]
Rad Get a lot of identity theft at the Wiener Kabob?
Bud You’d be surprised.
Rad Let’s see, how do you spell Rad again? [Chuckles] I know. I’ll just check my old trusty… [Feels that his name tag isn’t there] My name tag! It’s gone! How did this happen? [Gasps] Identity thief.
Bud Told you, sir.
Rad Without my name tag, I might as well not exist!
Bud I could just take cash.
Rad Hold on, name tag! [Rips seatbelt and kicks one of his car’s windows and climbs out] I’m a-comin’ for ya! Name tag! Name tag? [Crinkly looks over for name tags and hisses] Name tag? [Opens Neil’s mouth] Name tag? [Lifts under a rock] Name tag?
Gerald Yes? I’m Gerald Nametag.
Rad Where are you, name tag? It’s no use. Who are you?
K.O. [Exits the Bodega] Rad, there you are. I’ve been looking all over for you.
Rad [Sees his name tag on K.O.] Hey. Your name tag says you’re Rad. Identity thief!
K.O. But Rad, I—
Rad You stole my name tag!
K.O. I’ll give it back.
Rad Oh, you’d like that, wouldn’t you? But I’m afraid there’s only one way to settle who the real Rad is. Rad-off!
K.O. Talking it over.
Rad Wait, what? No, no, we’re doing a Rad-off. You’re Rad. Should’ve known that. [The crowd sees the Rad-off starting] Welcome, everybody, to the ninth annual Rad-off. We are joined upon this hallowed ground to consecrate the one and true Radicles, for there is only one Rad.
Enid Hallelujah.
Rad This one and only Rad shall be determined through a contest of feats. Contest the first, belch race. [Drinks soda to get ready] [Burps which makes the cars go on fire and the alarms go off]
K.O. [Jaw drops and drinks soda. Makes a little burp] Oh, well. Guess you won that one, Rad.
Rad What kind of sick mind game are you trying to play here, Rad? Your burp was way faster than mine. But I’ll get you in the next round. [Shows the inventory room with the crowd] Contest the second— the lifting and arranging of crates. Now, get ready to witness crateness greatness. [Levitates the crate and pushes it to the shelf]
[Crowd cheers]
Rad Your move, Rad.
K.O. All right, get ready to witness my boxy, uh, moxy! [Runs to put the crate in the shelf real quick] No good?
Rad No good? You didn’t even need to use your special alien beam powers to get that crate up there. It was basically the most baller thing you could’ve done.
K.O. Cool. I keep winning. Maybe I’m really Rad after all.
Rad Don’t get cocky yet, Rad. [Next contest is at the Bodega store] Contest the last. Rippity rap battle, dawg!
K.O. Rap battle? Are we supposed to punch each other with rhymes?
Rad More or less. Gimme a beat, Enid!
Enid No, thanks.
Rad Aw, man, come on.
Enid [Sighs] Fine. [Puts on her DJ outfit and flips the counter to her DJ set. Plays music]
Rad Yeah, I can work with that. All right, imposter, get ready, ‘cause this ends here. [Rapping] Ohh, I’m the extraterrestrial, emphasis on extra. My skin is blue because I come from Planet X, bruh. If you step on this, you gonna get creamed. If you outta line, you gonna get laser beamed. Arms ripped, afro poofy. Ears tipped, you goofy. Liftin’ and pumpin’ and crushin’ the weights. Don’t be surprised when I thrash you. Movin’ and settin’ and stackin’ the crates. [Uses his powers to move the crates] And you ain’t nothin’ but trash, do. [Throws K.O. into the crate “trash”] You lookin’ foolish. You ain’t the real me. I am the true Rad. I know you feel me. He is Radicles. Ain’t nobody ever wanna mess with me. I said he is Radicles. I ain’t got time for no identity thief. [Drops mic]
Enid Hey! Careful with my gear!
Rad [Picks up mic] Sorry, Enid.
Enid That’s right you are.
K.O. Uh, Enid, do you know "Wash Your Hands"?
Enid I’ll see what I can do, K.O.. Knock em dead! [Replaces a disk with a new one. Plays a new song]
K.O. Oh, cool. All right, here goes nothin’. [Rapping] Well, I’m Radicles and I’m here to say. I learned a lot about myself today. [Takes out notepad] I’m a yoga guy with a yoga mat. Don’t believe it, ask the kids I babysat. Sharks and bees ain’t where it’s at. I rather snuggle up with a kitty cat. I like to burp and I like to toot. But deep inside, I’m really cute. Wash your hands, wash your hands. It’s a good idea to wash your hands. [Drupe starts to giggle] Lather ‘em up with a little bit of soap. Wash your hands, don’t be a dope.
Rad [Grabs mic from K.O.] Listen, imposter. I don’t babysit or do yoga, and I definitely don’t like snuggling kittens.
K.O. I don’t understand. That all seems like cool stuff to me.
Rad But Rad would never find that stuff cool. And even if he did, Rad wouldn’t be ready to share those things about himself. If you really were Rad, you’d know that.
K.O. Oh. Gah! You got me! All that stuff I rapped about was lies. I was, uh, trying to embarrass you. Yeah. Isn’t that what rapping battles are all about?
Rad I guess. Uh, yeah! Yeah, you’re right!
K.O. Well, I guess my little plan didn’t work. You’re the real Rad— [Hands name tag to Rad and puts it on] tough, cool, and totally one-dimensional.
Enid [Record scratches] All right, I’m bored. Everybody out. [Her DJ set turns back to a counter] [Changes her outfit and listens to her music]
Crowd Aw. So lame.
Rad K.O.! When did you get here? You just missed me crush this fake Rad dude in a rippity rap battle. [Scoffs] He was totally about to cry.
K.O. I can only imagine. [Winks]
Rad You got something in your eye?
K.O. Nope!
Rad Hey, Enid, can you play that freestyle I did back for K.O.?
Enid Nope, nope.
Rad Fine! I’ll just do a quick acoustic set for my pal K.O.. [Beatboxes] [Rapping] I definitely don’t like to knit in my spare time. Don’t want to sit and unwind with a ball of twine. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
[K.O. winks]
[The episode ends]


ve Transcripts
Pilot Lakewood Plaza Turbo
Shorts KOEnidRadCarolEnid's Bad DayBarrels and CratesRad CriesRad's VanCommercialPower-Up!!!DendyBoxmore Infomercial
Season 1 Let's Be HeroesLet's Be FriendsYou're Everybody's SidekickWe Messed UpJethro's All YoursYou're Level 100!Sibling RivalryI Am DendyYou Get MeYou Are RadJust Be a PebblePresenting Joe CuppaDo You Have Any More in the Back?My Dad Can Beat Up Your DadWe've Got PestsLegends of Mr. GarKnow Your MomWe're CapturedFace Your FearsEverybody Likes Rad?You Have to CarePlaza PromSecond First DateOne Last ScoreT.K.O.Stop Attacking the PlazaWe've Got FleasNo More Pow CardsA Hero's FateLet's Have a StakeoutParents DayWe Got HackedRad Likes RobotsKO's Video ChannelThe Power Is Yours!Glory DaysPlazalympicsBack in Red ActionLet's Take a MomentVillains' Night OutVillains' Night InPlaza ShortsLet's Watch the PilotMystery Science Fair 201XLad & LogicOK Dendy! Let's Be K.O.!RMS & Brandon's First EpisodeLet's Not Be SkeletonsAction NewsThe Perfect MealHope This FliesYou're in Control
Season 2 Seasons ChangeLord Cowboy DarrellPlaza Film FestivalBe a TeamMy Fair CarolLet's Watch the Boxmore ShowYour World is an IllusionThe So-Bad-icalPoint to the PlazaT.K.O.'s HouseRed Action to the FutureDendy's PowerSpecial DeliveryWisdom, Strength And CharismaBittersweet RivalsAre You Ready for Some Megafootball?!Mystery SleepoverFinal ExamsSoda GenieCarolQuestBoxman CrashesMonster PartyCrossover NexusSuper Black FridayPlaza AloneAll in the VillainySidekick ScoutsWhacky JaxxyzProject Ray WayI Am JethroGarQuestGar Trains Punching JudyBeach EpisodeOK A.U.!KO's Health WeekRad's Alien SicknessDark Plaza
Season 3 We Are HeroesKO, Rad, and Enid!TKO RulesChip's DamageK.O. vs. FinkThe K.O. TrapWhatever Happened to... Rippy Roo?Planet XDeep Space VacationBig RevealRadical RescueLet's Meet SonicLet's Get ShadowyYou're a Good Friend, KORed Action 3: Grudgement DayCarlDendy's Video ChannelLet's Fight to the EndThank You for Watching the Show
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