No More Pow Cards/Transcript

This is a transcribed copy of "No More Pow Cards". Feel free to add contents to this page, as long as information comes from the episode.

Previous: "Second First Date"

Next: "Let's Watch the Pilot"

Speaker	Dialogue
Narrator	Mad Sam! Human level three. A mutant straight from the Danger Zone and a warrior of the road. Bomber Fan! Hero level two. A boisterous teen with a talent for pyrotechnics. His personality is— [bomb explodes] EXPLOSIVE! Punching Judy! Hero level three. The heart of a fighter, and the mind of a twenty-something! [cuts to K.O. showing Dendy his Pow Card collection]
K.O.	Chip Damage, level ten! The limited edition hologramic card!
Dendy	Ohh! Your collection is quite extensive, K.O.
K.O.	[giggles] Thanks. I’ve been collecting my whole life! I even have my own card! Once you do something really cool and heroic, you’ll get one too, Dendy.
Dendy	Actually, K.O., I’ll never have my own Pow Card.
K.O.	[shrieking] Whaaaaaaat?!
[Title card appears]
Dendy	I’m unable to receive a Pow Card because...I’m a Kappa.
K.O.	Whassat?! [stutters] I mean, whass’you?
Dendy	Kappas are a species of semi-aquatic creatures. Many decades ago, my people lived in ponds and small lakes. Eventually, land-dwellers began to settle in the area. Kappas were forced to live under bridges, and eat leftovers from their new above ground neighbors. It wasn’t ideal, but we adapted to the situation. But then, people started making up stories about Kappas pulling people underwater!
K.O.	What?
Dendy	Precisely. The reality was very different from the rumors.
Kappa	[is kicked in the face by the human on the bridge above] Gahhh! [sprays human with water]
Rude Kid	Wahhh! Daddyyy! A Kappa tried to drown me!
Dendy	Despite their absurdity, the stories persisted, and Kappas came to be seen as monsters, incapable of power or heroism. That is why Kappas are ineligible for Pow Cards. Observe! [Dendy presses a button on the Pow Card machine. The screen reads: "ERROR — NO KAPPAS" and has a frowning face.]
K.O.	But— you’re not a monster!
Dendy	Correct. Although, I do eat a lot of fish heads.
K.O.	How can I keep collecting these cards when they exclude one of my friends?
Dendy	It’s true...it would appear that from a moral standpoint, Pow Cards are inherently...wrong.
K.O.	Exactly, Dendy! Pow Cards are wrong, and bad!
Dendy	Then the next course of action is clear!
K.O.	[nods] Hm!
[Cuts to K.O. and Dendy at the top of a volcano. K.O. is holding the book that contains all his Pow Cards.]
K.O.	Ready, Dendy?
Dendy	Ready. [She presses a button on her backpack and gets her Pow Card collection out. They both stand over the volcano, about to drop the cards into the lava.]
Dendy	It doesn’t make sense to hold onto something so negative, K.O. No matter how much satisfaction they bring to both of us, or their...symbolic importance in the timeline of our friendship…
K.O.	[sniffles] Dendy, I can’t do it! These cards are important to me! I-I know they’re bad, but...I still like them. I’m sorry, Dendy. [wipes away a tear]
Dendy	K.O., I...I don’t want to throw them away, either.
K.O.	[gasps]
Dendy	I can’t explain why, but I just don’t! I don’t know how I can still feel attached to something that I know is bad!
K.O.	Maybe...maybe we’re bad.
Dendy	Or mayyybe we can appreciate what’s good about Pow Cards while still their recognizing their faults! K.O., we don’t have to volcano our Pow Cards. We can like them for what they mean to us.
K.O.	I’m so glad this is all solved now. [A star iris begins to close in around K.O.] Wait! We still don’t know why Pow Cards exclude Kappas based on super old myths!
Dendy	Let’s go directly to the manufacturer and find out!
[Cuts to the Pow Card Industries building.]
Dendy	Thank you, mom and dad.
Pavel	Sure thing, Den.
Pepelina	We’ll pick you two up after we get back from your aunt’s.
Pavel	[ribbit] Hey, you wanna switch places, Den? [laughs]
Pepelina	Oh, Pavel, you stinker! [laughs]
Pavel	I’m just fibbin’! [laughs as they drive away]
Dendy	It’s their anniversary next month. I’m very proud.
K.O.	Focus, Dendy.
Dendy	Oh, yes.
K.O.	Let’s get going.
Krissa	Okay, folks, let’s get this tour moving!~ This is our decorative break room. And on your left are some offices.
Dendy	Hmmm.
Krissa	And our gift shop is just down the hall! [Dendy raises her hand] Yup!
Dendy	Where in this facility are the Pow Cards actually...created? I’m asking for my...book report.
Krissa	Great question, sir! All of our cards are generated in a secret room right over there. Behind the beautiful statue of our company’s founder!
Dendy	That’s it?
Krissa	Yup!
Dendy	Oookay. [Dendy and K.O. make their way to the room.]
Krissa	Those kids were fun!
[Dendy and K.O. try to sneak past the statue, which causes it to come to life. It throws a giant golden Pow Card at them.]
Dendy & K.O.	Aaah!
[Dendy hides behind a pillar and starts to code rapidly. K.O. is grabbed by the statue.]
Powio Statue	[robotically] Geeeeh!
[The statue is deactivated and falls over, revealing a smiling Dendy.]
Dendy	Excellent job distracting the statue android, K.O.! Let’s move forward. [They enter the secret room.]
K.O.	Coming! Whoa. Dendy, it’s really the place where they find new heroes! [gasps] And look! It’s a computer! You love those!!
Dendy	Indeed.
K.O.	[laughs] This is sooo exciting! [inhales] Probably gonna take forever to hack into—
Dendy	[hacker voice] I’m in. I have written an override code that will allow the system to recognize the biosignatures of Kappas around the world. All I have to do is press this butto—
[A laser beam shoots over her head.]
Guards	Leave! Step away from the hero-puterrrr! You devils are under arrest for trespassing.
K.O.	Awwwh, but we were so sneaky!
Guard	Does this look sneaky to you?! [holds up a screen which shows K.O. running away from the statue android, screaming]
Mr. Cardsley	Put them down, and back away. I’ll take it from here.
Guard	[saluting] Yes, Mr. Cardsley III.
Mr. Cardsley	[to Dendy and K.O.] Now, now, it’s alright. Did you get lost? Tours are back out there, kids!
K.O.	We are not here for no tour! Well, not today. Right, Dendy?
Dendy	That is correct.
K.O.	In fact, we got a bone to pick with you, mister!
Mr. Cardsley	Is that so? Alright, I’m all ears.
K.O.	Mr. Cardsley! All our lives we’ve loved Pow Cards! [pulls out his collection] See?
Mr. Cardsley	Oh. Very nice.
K.O.	But then, we found out you don’t let Kappas be recognized as heroes! And that’s the most messed up thing I ever heard! So fix it, [sobbing] plee-eee-ase.
Mr. Cardsley	Well what’s there to fix? I mean, why in the world would Kappas need Pow Cards?
K.O.	Be...cause!!! It’s bad to leave them out! Don’t be bad!
Mr. Cardsley	And you’re asking we include them for...what, exactly? Drowning people? Honestly, I’ve never seen a Kappa do anything of significance. Heroic or otherwise, they’re just little monsters. And though we appreciate your feedback here at Pow Industries, this is the system we’ve used for decades. There’s no need to change a thing.
K.O.	But can’t you see how much it upsets us?!?!
Mr. Cardsley	[sighs] Look, I’m sorry you’re so upset, kid, but it’s the simple truth.
K.O.	It’s nowhere near the truth! My friend Dendy here does great things all the time! And- and-! ...Do you even know any Kappas, Mr. Cardsley?
Mr. Cardsley	I...uhhh...Guards!
Guards	Yessir!
Mr. Cardsley	Please escort these trespassers off the premises.
Guards	Yessir!
K.O.	Still?! After all my tears?
Dendy	Please wait. ...Once more.
Guards	Aw, c’mon!! Just...wanna cuff...so baa-aa-aad!! [rolls away sobbing]
Dendy	Mr. Cardsley. Have you ever considered the reason the world does not view Kappas as heroic is because we don’t have any heroes of our own to look up to? And for those that are out there doing something you’d call noteworthy, we’ll never get to notice, if your computer doesn’t, either. All I request is for us to be given a chance.
Mr. Cardsley	[sigh] Fine. If you insist on learning the hard way. Carla!
Carla	Greetings, Mr. Cardsley!
Mr. Cardsley	Carla, my trusty engineer. Can you temporarily allow the hero-puter to detect the Kappa species?
Carla	I’d love to!! Just gimme one minute…ooh!
Dendy	Pardon, I’ve already written an override code for your system.
Carla	I...just making sure you’re not trying any funny business! [chuckles] It would’ve taken me forever to write this code! Please, press away!
[Dendy activates the override code.]
Mr. Cardsley	Ohh. Sorry, kids. Like I said, Kappa— aaah!
Carla	Wow!
[Tons of Kappa suddenly appear on the world map shown on screen]
Mr. Cardsley	What the—? [picks up a new Pow Card] Hot hot hot hot hot! How can this be? I — was — wrong? I. Can’t. Process. I was — always told I’m right! I — [begins sucking his thumb]
Carla	Oh, this is fantastic! Our database is flooded with new profiles! Sales have gone through the roof!! A new market of Kappas are buying our Pow Cards in droves! This is the biggest sale in the history of the company, Mr. Cardsley!
Employee Pup	Sir! There’s no place to hold all the Technos! [Technos burst through the door]
Mr. Cardsley	[to Dendy] Young lady. Dendy, was it?
Dendy	Yes.
Mr. Cardsley	Dendy, you’ve really taught me something here today. I thank you. And from now on, Pow Cards will recognize the heroic feats of Kappas across the globe! Grandfather would be proud...of how much money we’re making! [dives into the pile of Technos] Wheee-hee-hee! Woo hoo!
K.O.	Great job, as always, Dendy! There’s so many more cool Pow Cards I can strive to collect now!
Dendy	Yes, Kappas never needed Pow Cards to be heroes. But knowing that I can get one too, makes me feel...hmm! [smiles]
K.O.	But Dendy, this was super heroic! Look! [points down at Dendy’s Pow Card. Dendy picks up her new Pow Card and adds it to her collection.]
[The episode ends.]